i fell in love with him like ketchup falls out of a bottle: slowly, and then all at once.
I didn’t watch the whole documentary. After a few episodes it was too painful.
As your girlfriend, I will make it my duty to make you turned on at the most inappropriate of times.
So Jake and Amir are in this commercial with Rainn Wilson. Rain Wilson is on the office with John Krasinski. John Krasinski was in Leatherheads with George Clooney. And since I’ve met Jake and Amir twice and have Jake’s number in my cell, I like to think I’m a few degrees away from Clooney.
- teacher: where's your homework
- me: where's leonardo dicaprio's oscar
dont let anyone with bad eyebrows tell u shit about life
Ikea. Downtown Fredericksburg. Sushi. Carl’s. Abandoned UMW campus.
BEST. DATE. EVER.
I’ve always wondered how and why people became such light weights with alcohol after college and now I get it. Being an adult just fuckin takes it out of you.
